It’s been two and half months since we first landed here Russia. My stress level has grown to a point I don’t think I’ve ever experienced before. Past month felt like an episode of 24, stuck on the last minutes of the show, yet Jack Bauer doesn’t know that times moving at a snails pace! He’s constantly thinking the times almost up and whatever horrible thing is still about to happen, is about to happen. The sound of the ticking clock constantly beeping in my ear reminding me that times almost up. I’m no Jack, and forcing a document from Moscow is something I fear even he can’t accomplish.
Procrastination….A nasty habit I justify by telling myself I work better under stress.
Starting to think I probably haven’t experienced real stress before, whatever that may be, to know that’s it’s just not worth it.
It’s about time I kick this bad habit, just like the other ones I’ve regularly dropped in the past. I’m sure I still have a ton lined up, just waiting to show their true colors so I can show them the way out. Sadly, it seems like it’s taking too long for me to learn my lessons, no matter how much I read or I am told. I have to live it to believe it to kick it. If only I was the only one affected by the outcome of my faults, then I’d be able to live peacefully knowing that I’m the only one receiving the hits. Yet it seems like the people around me, feel the shockwaves of my mistakes, and the closer they are, the harder it hits them.
I believe theres a reason for everything that happens to us in our lives. Every aspect is a learning experience, no matter how small it might seem to us. I believe there are many reasons why my life took a turn towards Russia.
Perseverance is something I respect in the Russian clan. They hit hard and from many angles, break their way through never taking no for an answer no matter what the situation. Having the mindset that there’s always a way. But that’s just how society here forces you to be. Unless you push forward, the current throws you back. Something that in Canada isn’t very widespread from my experience. Everything is “by the book” and don’t get me wrong, its not a bad thing at all, but once you leave the walls and realized theres a whole world out there that works on different sets of rules, you need think out-side the box to make it happen.
Persevere… A much needed habit.
Think i’ll start working on new valuable habits, as I drop my bad ones…
Might just speed things up a little.